Monday 14 October 2013

Cleaning Up After Sex - Don't Dunk Your Penis



I’ve been fascinated this week about the worldwide interest in the confession of a woman who stated that post coital her male partner dips his penis into a bedside tumbler of water whilst waiting to use the bathroom after she has finished her ablutions.

As I’ve never come across this in all my years of having sex with men it’s had me thinking about what are some of the issues regarding post-coital male/male cleanups?

Courtesy of Tumblr
You’ve just had a shag with your man and one of the purposes of good man-to-man sex is to spill that seed. You’re going to do that into a condom internally and then peel it off and dispose of it without spilling the contents. No problem here.

Or  you’ve shagged without a condom and

(1) you’ve deposited a good load up inside your man which will eventually find its way out though not immediately (again, no pressing time issue here) or

(2) you’ve shot externally over his crack, his buttocks, his back, his chest, his balls or his face so when ready, a quick wipe with a handily located ‘cum towel’ does the trick. Sure, in due course you’ll enjoy a shower to remove the remaining lube and any dry cum, but there’s no need to miss the enjoyable post-sex cuddle and chat by immediately heading off to the bathroom.

Perhaps your sex was limited to oral, so again, he either swallowed your load or used the towel after you’d spilled like a geyser.

It’s been my experience that most men don’t blow and then immediately have a need for a clean-up. The exception to this are some Asian cultures who can blow and be in the bathroom in what seems like the blink of an eye. If you understand this culture you’ll not be offended that it was anything you said or did. Mind you, he’ll be back in a short time for round two - it’s just that he doesn’t want to feel unclean for more than a moment.

Most men I’ve encountered don’t need to rush for a cleanup shower before beginning another round of sex. If there’s cum still on the cock that just adds flavor and intimacy to the passion. Many a man will lick clean his lover’s spilled cum whilst it’s still warm, and by sharing an immediate kiss there is a heightened mixing of sperm and saliva which is a great way to continue the intimacy of being in each other’s arms whilst resting between bouts. All of a man is enjoyable to share and a sticky cock is no exception. However, if it’s been bare inside your partner, then a wash before oral begins again is recommended. That’s simple hygiene.

One of the joys of gay male sex can be showering together after you’ve lingered a while in bed. Share lots of lathering of each other including cleansing the intimate areas like his cock head and around his rosebud. When a partner does this for you it takes the sex to another intimate level, and frequently begins a whole new round of sexual activity. It’s certainly also wise to urinate as soon after sex as possible as that helps clean out the tract thus lowering the possibility of urethral infections.

In short, as male lovers, embrace your naked bodies, enjoy spilling your seed and even more embrace the task of cleaning it up with a willing tongue and a warm mouth. Dipping your cock in to a glass of water bedside simply will not substitute for sharing the bathroom together - after all you’ve just been as intimate as two men can be so this is not the time to go shy.

So, balance the need for hygiene against ruining the bonding intimacy that exists immediately after you have both blown. Of course, if you want to exit the scene then a clean-up shower is a good way to say in action terms that the session is finished.  But if intimacy is your scene and you’re in to kissing, cuddling and pleasurable naked body contact then don’t let a bit of stickiness take that pleasure from you both.


Disclaimer: All advice and information given here on this blog is general in nature and non-specific to any individual, couple or group. You are encouraged to seek your own independent professional medical, psychological and counselling advice. 


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